Ooooh I got sooooo mad!!!!!

It’s amazing to me how we can go from being in a great mood and one person or event can make it change instantly. Letting them take our joy is a choice but sometimes we are not prepared or expecting a conversation to transpire. In this case I wasn’t prepared to have this conversation or the response I had. The response was letting this person have my joy. It actually was more than that. The joy wasn’t just gone, but a feeling of wanting to vomit came over me, thinking I was going to faint or have a heart attack where I was standing. All these circling emotions were also coming up. This conversation in fact was an indirect conversation. I wasnt even in it! The way I responded was surprising and almost shocking to me! But why was I shocked? I shouldn’t have been. I hadn’t dealt with any of the pain this person has inflicted on me. I just accepted what had happened and moved on. I thought I was ok. I’m fine. Whatever. I’m good. That’s their choice to act that way, etc.

Truth. I wasn’t fine. I wasn’t good. I was jacked the hell up.

Why?????????? Because I had not dealt with the hurt from this specific person. You have to deal with the hurt from other people. You can’t just move on. It doesn’t work that way. Even if you want it to. Even if you are as strong as Wonder Woman and Superman combined. You have to deal with the hurt, the pain, the emotions. If you don’t, it will come back in ways that hurt you even more. Sickness, depression, anxiety, eating disorders, anger, guilt and It will reside in you until you deal with it.

Deal with it today. Deal with it now. It isnt worth carrying around. Talk it out with someone. Dive deep. Name the feelings. Then forgive them or forgive yourself if that is what is needed and start to heal. Heal your heart. Heal your mind and heal your spirit. You gotta heal. Life is too short to not enjoy the Joy and happiness in each day. Choose Joy!!

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